Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Citrus is NOT My Friend

I recently had my first brush with heartburn.  I have to say I was starting to think something was wrong with the band.  Isn't that always the first thing that comes to mind?
Then all of a sudden it hit me, the one thing that I was doing differently, the only thing that had changed was this...

Seriously?  It's water!  This goes to show you how sensitive our systems can be and how one little thing can make a difference.  As soon as I stopped the orange water (I was only having one a day), the heartburn stopped.

I'm not bashing the product. I really enjoy having these once in a while, I just can't have the citrus flavor anymore.  Just a little FYI for my fellow bandsters.

Have a great night.

This is The Week

I have entered the week of 'no gym'.  This is the week I've been dreading.  All my visitors/babysitters have gone home and hubby is working out of state, so I'm left here with a preschooler who has not started school yet.  Once she's back to school I can get to the gym while she's gone.  In the meantime, I have to make it work without being a slacker.

Yesterday while my niece was still here in the morning, I ran 2 miles.  Today I did 30 minutes on the elliptical in my basement.  Tomorrow I'll have to run on my treadmill.  I really have no excuse not to exercise, just because I can't actually go to a class.

I also bought myself a nice journal that I keep on my kitchen counter.  I get up every morning, record my weight, and jot down my food intake all day.  I can't believe how much of a difference that makes.

My husband and I are in a little bit of a competition these days too, which is helping me get my butt moving!  We have super neat pedometers and we check in with each other at the end of the day to see who has more steps.  Here's mine from yesterday...

It's amazing to see the difference between days that I work (sitting down all day) and days that I do a class or a run.  On my kick boxing day I had over 13,000 steps.  I tell ya', since we've been competing, I don't sit down much!

So that's my plan for the week of no gym.  I sure hope it works and that my body won't hate me too much.

Have a great day!

Tuesday, August 30, 2011


Have you guys heard of the show called "Heavy"?  I just happened to find it while browsing on Net Flix.  All I can say is WOW!
They have 2 morbidly obese people on each episode who are followed for 6 months.  They meet with trainers, dietitians, therapists, etc.  They address both the physical and emotional aspects of obesity.  I've only watched one episode so far but I think I just might like this show better than the Biggest Loser.
Check it out, see if you can find it on the internet.  Let me know what you think!

Sunday, August 28, 2011

A Photo Re-Do

So hubby came home from working out of state and checked out my blog.  You may remember he's the resident photographer for my monthly updates, but he wasn't here to take the one year anniversary shot.  Well, let's just say he laughed, and made some remark about how he can't believe I actually used the picture I took in the mirror!  He insisted on a re-do.

For those of you who missed it, you can see it here.

And now for the husband approved, new and improved picture update...

Size 10 shorts

Size Medium shirt
I can't decide if I like the outfit or not.  It's one of the new ones from my shopping spree. Hubby said I looked cute.  I'm thinking I looked a little pregnant!

I just can't win.  Now that I can buy anything off the rack without a problem, I have no fashion sense and have no idea what to buy.

Oh well, I hope everyone had a fantastic day.  Good night!

Saturday, August 27, 2011

Goal! (sort of) and Coming Out (a little)


OK, let me clarify that by stating that I'm now just below my doctor's goal.  This is where he wanted to see me.
**It should be noted (blah blah blah) that according to the American Medical Assoc., I'm still overweight.**
I have to admit that a year ago this goal seemed so unreachable.  I've never been this weight as an adult and had a hard time thinking I could actually get here.  Now I can see myself going even lower.  My head is in a whole different place now.

That being said, it is Saturday and that means it's weigh in day.  So, my total loss to date is...

61 pounds

Now for the 'coming out' part.  You all know I've kept this blog anonymous, mostly because so few people know I had the surgery and I'd like to keep it that way.  I've also kept my actual weight a secret.  Sure, I post how much I've lost but you'll notice I've never posted a weight.  I guess growing up heavy, I've always been ashamed of my weight.  I never wanted anyone to know my numbers.  I'd be mortified.  Heck, sometimes I didn't even want to know how much I weighed, let alone tell someone else!

Today I decided I'm tired of hiding.  I'm coming out and letting the world know how much I weigh (and still not telling you who I am!).  
I will no longer be ashamed of the numbers, and will be proud of how far I've come.  I think I owe it to myself to be proud, because I've worked darn hard for this!  So, here it is.  Today I weigh 169 pounds.  You can add that to the big red number up above and see what my starting weight was.  My current BMI is 28.  It used to be 39.  I think that's pretty cool.

I hope you all have a wonderful day today, and learn to be proud of your accomplishments too.

Be well!

Thursday, August 25, 2011

I'm Here, and Lurking

My niece is here visiting us for a week.  We've been busy doing lots of fun stuff and getting her ready to start back to school next week (they start after Labor Day in NY).  That means I don't have a lot of time to post, but I've been lurking...reading a few blogs here and there, and trying to leave a few comments when I can.

Remember nobody in my family knows about my band so I feel 'sneaky' over here!

I have lots of stuff to report (like a new all time now!) but it'll have to wait until I have time to actually sit down and get the thoughts out of my head and onto the screen.

Until then, be well and have fun!

Monday, August 22, 2011

Fickle Phil!

Yesterday I had to get up before the butt crack of dawn to go to work.  I made my protein shake and hit the road.

I took one sip and...Ugh, holy mother, it felt like there was a block of cement sitting in my stomach, preventing the liquid from going down.  This is the same shake I've had every morning for 2 freaking years!

I gave up and put the shake in the fridge and brewed some decaf.  I sat in my station and sipped that hot coffee, ever so slowly, all while praying to the Band Gods that I wouldn't have to puke while on camera.  I've done that before, and believe me, it's not as classy or glamorous as it sounds.

I literally felt like there was something in there, sitting at the top of my stoma, which is pretty impossible because I hadn't eaten anything since dinner the night before.  Damn you Phil, why do you do this to me?

By lunch time I was actually hungry (and a little pissed off I might add) so I decided to try to have some Greek Yogurt.  It took a while to finish the yogurt, and I was standing up for maximum gravitational pull, but darn it, I got it down.
Back to work, and back to praying for no pukey pukey.

After work I came home and told my hubby what was happening.  I had to prepare him because we were headed over to some friends house for dinner, and God help me, we were having pizza!  These friends are moving out of the area this week so we went over to say goodbye and bring dinner.  Who wants to cook when you're in the middle of a move, right?

I went armed with a plan.  I brought a yogurt and explained that I've been having trouble eating lately and might just have the yogurt if I can't tolerate pizza.  They do NOT know about the band but I have told them (a big fat lie) that I sometimes have trouble digesting/processing certain foods, especially bready stuff.
I sit down at dinner with a baby sized slice of pizza and take a teeny tiny bite and wait.  Hey, what the heck, that was good and didn't hurt.  It didn't get stuck!  What's up with that?  That darn Phil is so fickle.  Apparently he doesn't like protein shakes but loves pizza?  Go figure.  I never knew I could eat pizza until now.  OK, admittedly it was a child size piece but I'll take that any day as long as it stays down.

I had just decided there was no rhyme or reason to this band and no way to figure out why it's sometimes tight, and sometimes not, and then BAM.  I woke up this morning and TOM was visiting.  Gee, didn't I have a super tight band episode last time TOM was here?  Oh yes, that's right, but that was only THREE WEEKS AGO!  I can't keep track of this stuff and plan for it when things don't happen on schedule people.

Now it seems appropriate that I gave my band a male name, because just like most men, it can't make up it's mind!  OK, that was just plain mean, it's the hormones talking, I swear.

I should probably go eat something with no nutritional value, just to keep Phil happy.
Have a great day everyone!

Saturday, August 20, 2011

The Official Results

Because I love order and consistency, I'm still doing my weigh in results using my own scale (forget for a moment what the doc said the other day).  Today is Saturday which is weigh in day at our house!
My official 'at-home' results are in.
I'm down a total of...


That's down 1.3 since last time (I didn't post a weigh in the week we got back from our mini vacation).

Now the real challenge begins.  My MIL went back home so I no longer have a live in baby sitter.  Hubby is working out of town 4 days a week, and I can't leave the kiddos home alone.  I have a couple weeks until they'll both be back at school.  Once that happens I can go to the gym while they're in school and all will be right with the world.  Until then, what to do, what to do!?  I'll be missing all my regular classes.  No kick boxing for 2 weeks!  I'm terrified.
I guess the thing to do would be to come up with a plan.  I'm not great at that you know.  However, I KNOW I can get my cardio in because I can walk the kids to the library, pushing them in the double jogger.  That's a 2 mile trip while pushing more than 90 pounds.
We also have a treadmill and an elliptical in the basement for rainy excuses there.  Not too sure how I'll get the weight lifting in though.  I cringe at the thought of losing the little bit of muscle tone I have gained over these past few months!

I guess I'm just afraid of losing my routine.  I have made these classes a habit and I don't want to struggle to get back into it.  The good thing is that this will get me, no FORCE me to leave my comfort zone.  I'll have to do different things to stay in shape.  And once the kids are in school I'll have to take different classes, ones that I've never tried before, in order to fit the times I need.
Change is good, right?

I'm off to work now.  Hope you all have a wonderful day!

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Happy Birthday Phil!

Today my band, who I fondly named "Phil" is celebrating his first birthday!

Happy Birthday Phil, and thank you for cooperating, being a good boy, and staying put!  I spent a lot of this first year worrying about complications.  I think I'm a little more relaxed about that now, just a little.

I had my one year post-op check with the surgeon today.  I had been hoping to get to that elusive 60 pound mark by this appointment and (according to my scale) hadn't gotten quite there.  I was bout 1.4 pounds shy.  HOWEVER, my surgeon says I've lost 62 pounds since my first consult with him.  Have I mentioned I love that man?

He comes in all smiles, welcoming and congratulating me.  He goes on about how I've had a year of weight loss, and done well, now I'll be entering the maintenance phase, etc.  Then he opens my file and says "Oh, I owe you a huge apology, I made a mistake!".  Apparently he forgot I was a band patient and was giving me the speech meant for bypass or sleeve folks.  He says "You've done so well and lost so much weight I had myself convinced you were gastric bypass".

We talked about goals.  He says I'm where he wanted to see me, as far as a 'healthy' weight.  If I choose to lose more, that's fine, but he's satisfied that I'm out of the danger zone.  He explained that if weight loss patients can keep the weight off between years one and two, they are more likely to keep it off for good.  However, beware of the creeping pound here and there...they add up.  Been there, done that!  At this point he encourages me to weigh myself several times a week to keep on track and prevent the dreaded gain.

They gave me my 'before picture' and I must say I was mortified.  How on earth did I walk around looking like that and not know how bad I looked?  And to think I was exercising a lot even back then, and still looked like a big hot mess!  I need to laminate that thing and post it on my fridge as a permanent reminder.  Scary.

After my appointment my MIL and I went and did some shopping.  OK, we did A LOT of shopping!  I realized I had absolutely no clothes for the fall and before you know it the weather will be changing.  It was good to have her there helping me because she gave me her honest opinion and helped me realize what size I'm NOT.  It's crazy how the brain works.  I still see the fatty in the mirror.  I tried on some size 12 pants.  They were a tiny bit loose in the waist but I was going to buy them anyway.  She went and grabbed me the 10 and made me try them on.  Yup, they fit.  How can that be?!  I've never been a 10 in my life (well, maybe in elementary school!).

The appointment with the surgeon and the retail therapy gave me a boost in the right direction.  I felt like I got a "tune up" which made me feel better about myself.  I need to get out of my own way and stop feeling like the forever fat girl.  When a doctor tells you "You're at a good weight", that's got to be a good thing, right?  I mean, he went to medical school and happens to be an expert in the field of weight loss.  I'm just an expert in dieting, and weight gain!

So, in keeping with tradition, here are the picture comparisons.  I had to take today's myself as hubby is out of town.  Sorry for the size discrepancy of the shots.  Here goes!


How's that for a comparison shot?

I think I need to look at that day one picture EVERY DAY to remind me of how far I've come, and that I never want to go back.

I hope you're all having a great week.  Be well!

Monday, August 15, 2011

Now THAT'S what I was Looking For

I met with the trainer this morning for 'part 2' of that fitness profile I was supposed to get last week.  The trainer was late (sigh) so I did a few laps around the track and did some stretches while I waited.

Once she arrived and we got started it was a great work out, lots of tips for problem areas, and she wrote everything down for me so I can go back and do it myself about once a week.  I consider myself pretty darn fit and work out 6 times a week, but when I left there this morning my legs were shaking.
That's a success in my book!

I still didn't get any of my numbers as far as body fat % because their machine is out for repair.  She assures me she will call me when it's ready and give me the news.  Do I really want to know?!  Ugh.

Tomorrow is my last week day shift at work since hubby is back in the world of the employed.  I'll be back to strictly weekends from now on, which makes me a very happy girl.  I've decided I like being a mom a whole lot better than I like working.

Speaking of mommyhood, my first born lost her first baby tooth today!  There's a lot of excitement going on here and she looks so darn cute with that little hole where a tooth used to be.  Let's hope the tooth fairy remembers to deliver tonight!

Have a great night everyone...until next time, be well.

Saturday, August 13, 2011

A Total Waste of My Time

Well, I went for my so called 'fitness profile' at the gym yesterday morning.  I was told not to work out that day and not to eat too much before the appt. as  I would be going through a series of fitness tests and it would be a pretty tough work out.  Nope, not so much. 

When I arrived, the trainer informed me that the 'machine' that they use to do all the important calculations is broken and has been sent out for repair.  She took my body measurements and wrote them down on a note pad, assuring me that as soon as the machine was repaired, she would plug in my numbers and print out the report.  Why do I feel less than confident about that actually happening?

She did bring me 60 pounds worth of weights and had me hold them just to see how much weight I've lost.  I love the whole 'imagine what it's like for your body to carry that around all day, every day!'.  Crazy, I know, but I did just that for way too many years.  Cool to see how far I've come.

Then she watched me do 4 squats and 4 lunges on each leg to see if I'm evenly balanced, or favoring one side over the other.  That's pretty much it except for a bunch of chatter about the benefits of exercise as we get "older". Ahem...pushing 40!

I kept wondering when the big work out was going to happen, and then she pulled out her date book and asked me when I could come back.  What?!  Why did I skip my morning class?  Why did I skip my mid morning snack?  She claims they shouldn't have told me that the assessment would be done that day, and that I'm supposed to come back on another day to have that done.  BIG WASTE OF TIME!  My schedule is already too busy, I don't have time for this mess.  Ugh!

I did find out that my cholesterol levels have crept up a bit since the doc reduced my dosage.  Not dangerously high but that dreaded LDL is not my friend!

So, I guess after I go for the REAL assessment, I'll have more, and hopefully exciting news.  I can only hope it won't be another waste of my time.

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Fitness Test and Profile

Call me crazy but I'm going to bite the bullet and have one of the trainers at my gym do a fitness profile on me tomorrow.  It's something that is included in our (enormously expensive) membership dues.  We can have the whole run down, including blood work, once a year.  I had the blood work done last year and totally chickened out and canceled the appointment with the trainer for the fitness stuff.  Who wants to hear them say "you're overweight and out of shape..."?  Not me.

Anyone remember having your body fat measured by the gym teacher in 9th grade?  I do and it was humiliating. I remember her telling me my body fat was 40%!  Seriously, how can that be?  Isn't the human body more than half water?  Then how the heck can I be 40% body FAT?!  I must not have any bones to speak of.
I'll never forget that moment, yet I'm heading in there tomorrow to have it done all over again (25 years later). I have made fitness a big part of my life and I'm hoping that shows during the test.  We shall see.

I'll be sure to check in with you all tomorrow to let you know how it goes, that is if I'm able to walk out of there, and use my arms enough to type.

Wish me luck!

I've been told I should not work out the morning of the test, that the work out I get with the trainer will be grueling and I don't want to be too tired out.  No problemo, no alarm for me tomorrow!

Monday, August 8, 2011


I just have to rant for a moment, indulge me...

Hubby is starting a new job this week.  Health insurance for said job won't start until October 1.  We decided to go ahead and buy a one month policy on our own to bridge the gap until the company benefits kick in.  We chose Humana since all our current docs accept that insurance.  One of their reps called to ask us a bunch of questions to make sure we're eligible and give us a rate.

Here's a bit of our conversation...

H:  I see you were on a medication last August prescribed by Dr. H.  Could you tell me what that was for?
Me:  Yeah, that's a pain killer given to me after my surgery
H: What surgery did you have?
Me: Bariatric surgery
H: Do you mean weight loss surgery?
Me: Yes.
H: Did you have Gastric Bypass?
Me: No, I had Gastric Banding.
H:  You have a Lap Band?
Me:  Yes.
H: Oh, we are unable to offer you coverage.
Me: What?
H:  We are unable to offer you coverage at this time.
Me:  Because I had weight loss surgery?
H: Yes, that's right.
Me:  So you mean if I was still morbidly obese and did nothing about it, you'd offer me coverage, but because I did something about it, you can't cover me?
H: Well, if you were in the normal weight range we would offer you coverage.
Me: Well, I wasn't in the normal weight range or I wouldn't have had to have surgery for it!  I am NOW in the normal weight range and you won't cover me?!
H: I can't offer you coverage at this time (I kept getting the same canned answer)

She wouldn't talk to me any more or give any more explanation after that.  She did however give my hubby a little more info. (I guess he's nicer than I am!).  She told him that the risk of relapse after weight loss surgery is too high for them to accept.

I've heard of discrimination against obese people, but seriously, discrimination against someone who actually got healthier and lost almost 60 pounds!
Can you tell I'm a little angry about this?  Not only that, but it's actually on my record that I was denied health care coverage, which truly pisses me off.
Humana is not so nice, and I am not happy!  Grrrr.
Hope you're all having a great day.

Saturday, August 6, 2011

I'm Back!

Phew, that was a crazy whirlwind of a week, and now I'm finally back home.

We went back East to see family and friends since hubby starts his new job Monday and won't have a lot of time off.  We are pretty sure we won't make it back for Christmas this year either, so this was a week of trying to see everyone in one shot.  Busy busy busy!

It took 11 hours for the return trip which is pretty good.  The kids were fantastic the whole time, we couldn't have asked for a better trip.  However, sitting down in a car for 11 hours is not great for my band and dinner is not even an option for me tonight.  I had some pudding and I'm going to bed early.

MIL came back with us and will be staying for 2 weeks to help the kiddos (and me!) with the transition of the new job and having Daddy be gone for half the week.  The good news for me, and bad for you, is that I won't have any hilarious "Ricky" type stories to share because I actually like my MIL and we get along great! So sorry Read :-)

Also, today is our 7 year wedding anniversary!  We actually celebrated earlier in the week since we knew we'd be on the road all day today.  Happy Anniversary to us!

I have TONS of blogs to read and catch up on but I am WAY too tired to do that tonight.
I hope you're all having a great weekend and I'll catch you tomorrow.
Be well!